Musings on Being Female in the Workplace

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Being female in the workplace ain't no picnic. Sometimes it's such a challenge that I even use words like "ain't."

In my 16 years out in the world, I've had four situations with male colleagues that have necessitated managerial, HR or police intervention. And in each instance, I always spent days or weeks or even months thinking "I bet I'm overreacting. I'll just wait and see what happens."

I'll wait and see what happens after a colleague stands two inches from me and screams in my face, spittle splattering my skin as veins throb in his bald head.

I'll wait and see what happens after a coworker uses his body mass to pin me against a wall so I can't escape from him at a work party.

I'll wait and see what happens when a former intern appears in my office to physically intimidate me, follows up with an angry email about my failings as a human being, and then begins calling my office extension endlessly and hanging up.

I'll wait and see what happens when a colleague makes me uncomfortable with inappropriate sexual conversation followed by repeated requests to get together outside the workplace.

Being the kind of human being that I am, I'm always inclined to give people the benefit of the doubt. I understand that I see the world through a dramatic filter, and that there are two sides to every interaction. But god in heaven, this needs to end.

Because if I keep waiting and seeing what happens, I could end up more than just scared one day. I could wait and see what happens ... and I'm followed to my car and assaulted. Or I'll could wait and see what happens ... and someone becomes violent when I don't want a relationship with them. Or I could wait and see what happens ... and I'm attacked in my office and can't get help.

Workplace intimidation, violence and harassment need to end. Not just for me, but for EVERY HUMAN BEING IN EVERY WORKPLACE. It's not OK for anyone of any sex to make a coworker uncomfortable at work. It's not OK to scream in peoples' faces, regardless of gender. Just going to work and doing our jobs is hard enough. Going through life is hard enough. This kind of behavior has to stop and it has to stop now.

I don't want to wait and see anymore.


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